The crying.

I don’t know how lesbian couples get through this. Girls – women – ladies – FEMALES cry. We just do. It isn’t about weakness or sensitivity, or manipulation (most of the time). It’s just how we’re wired to deal with extreme emotion. When the Princess and I argue, there are enough tears involved that the threshold point is already near. Swap the Princess out with a woman and the crying limit is breached far too early into the argument for the hidden, underlying issues to be addressed, much less resolved.

When the Princess and I clash, it’s usually a bit into the argument that we figure out what we’re really upset about, and this tends to be where my tears show up. The Princess usually doesn’t get weepy until we’re wrapping up the resolution. If he started crying when I did, the whole thing would get stupid far too soon to be useful and we’d have to delay and reschedule the end game. Totally inefficient. It would drive me nuts.

Unless I’m just not meeting the right lesbians, it doesn’t seem like they cry any less than hetero women. How do they get anything done in a relationship? Write each other letters? Argue via email? Texting?

I just realised that there is a pretty sizable percentage of people I know who have never interacted with me while I was entirely sober. Or at all sober. It’s an inverse relationship, the less I know you, the more you can expect that I’ve been drinking. Think about how you mingle at a party: you arrive sober and greet the people you know best, you get a drink, you greet the people you know but haven’t seen for a bit, you keep drinking, you get introduced to new people and greet those you rarely see. Repeat at each occasion. If you only see certain people at drinking occasions, they never see you sober. Especially so, if you consider yourself socially awkward and for the benefit of humanity consider it best to enjoy a medicinal cocktail or two. Though, on that note, I’m realising that almost everyone I know considers themselves to be socially awkward.

I hate – absolutely detest (detest is worse than hate, right?) how overused hero references have become. I’ve been watching the French open and what’s the headline after Andy Murray wins his match? Heroic Murray overcomes painful back injury to win. Heroic? Seriously? How about determined, or tenacious, or persevering? There’s a huge list of complementary yet more appropriate words available. But heroic? What a low bar we’ve set.

Heroic C.T. Thomas overcomes painful unseasonal flu to bake cookies.

I realise that I am in the minority on this one, but Ryan Gosling doesn’t really do it for me. I’m not referring to his ability as an actor or the quality of his movies, I couldn’t really comment on either. He’s just a bit more puppy dog than I like in a man. Alright that was slightly beside the point, but written as a preface so I can avoid looking like a fan girl for someone I’m not a fan girl for.

Here’s the point:

I suspect that Ryan Gosling got bullied as a kid. Often. Possibly daily. And I wonder how many of those same bullies now have to take their wives/girlfriends to Ryan Gosling movies just so they can get laid that night.

1. I hate when companies call me, and before I can even say hello I realise that I’m already on hold. Why not wait until there’s someone available to speak to me before the autodial calls? Is that really such a difficult piece of programing? Really?
2. ‘Disappearing’ the neighbours’ dog is not an option.
3. Leeks are awesome.
4. My mom and 3 of her friends (all over 60) are planning a trip to the Caribbean, and when she invites me along she’s actually serious. How does she come to the conclusion that this will be fun for all? This isn’t even fun for some. This wouldn’t even be fun for her. And she’s a bit miffed that I declined.
5. I need to move my seedlings into the garden early so as to deny The Princess the opportunity to kill them while I’m travelling.
6. I don’t know what I’ve eaten that’s made me this gassy.
7. Leeks are still awesome.